**EXCERPT
A video collage about obsession, insecurity, and identity stitched together from old journals, drawings, footage, and other fragments of my life — spanning junior high through college. There are my obsessive drawings of Cobra Commander, the big bad, from G.I. Joe—who was always hooded, always faceless. As a closeted Queer teen who hated his own reflection, I felt kinship with arch-villains, and the idea of covering my face felt like Heaven on Earth. There are sci-fi characters, vehicles, and star maps from Trinity 3000, an alternate universe I created—my refuge in early high school. There are journal entries—love-hungry, horny, desperate—written in the late 1980s Connecticut suburbs, where no one wanted to come out. VHS recordings of my teenage friends acting out Sharon Olds' poetry. Hi-8 footage of my childhood home, filmed the last time I saw it, each room emptied of life. A 16mm film I shot of a straight boy I was in love with in college. A stack of Montgomery Ward catalogs, filled with nostalgia. To bring it full circle, I filmed myself naked against a greenscreen—trying to reenter this chaotic world and make sense of where I came from.
YEAR: 2012
TRT: 10:30
MEDIUM: VHS / ANIMATION
PREMIERE: NEW YORK FILM FESTIVAL
DISTRIBUTION: VIDEO DATA BANK
CONTACT ME BLUE SKY
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